Sunday 19 May 2013

Beckham quits football.

There were tears of joy tonight as David Beckham finally hung up his boots to spend more time with his family. Beckham spent his last season in France where he was used to help generate income by promoting new sports kit for the fans.

Beckham's retirement will spare the blushes of England managers who had to negotiate carefully around Beckhanism. Afraid to tell him he was past it in case they were struck down by the baying tabloid press for being unpatriotic.

Beckham hung around the 2012 London Olympics like a bad smell. Hoping to get picked for 'Team GB' but being disappointed and forced to smile for the cameras instead while inwardly fuming.

He will now team up with Glasgow Rangers legend Gordon Ramsay to take the restaurant sector by storm.

Have a happy retirement Dave and 'keep believing'.


  1. If he teamed up with with his old club mate Ryan Giggs, they could start a chain of all day breakfast diners in the NW called 'Beckham and Giggs'. ('Fergie Fries' and 'Fergie's Full English' could be on the Man U menu).

  2. Sounds good anon....have special nights as well. An Ally McCoist 'eat as many pies as you can in one hour' type contest.
    For red nose day they could invite Fergie along to show off his nose for charity etc.


Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.